Selangor declares public holiday tomorrow for Star Wars

SELANGOR:  Just days after commemorating the state’s Malaysia Cup win, today the Selangor government again.

Pilots mull abandoning 747s at KLIA after losing parking machine tokens

KLIA:  Tonight the pilots of 3 Boeing 747-200F’s that have been parked on the apron.

MAS stops flying all routes to regain profitability

KLIA:  Today, Malaysia Airlines (MAS) announced it will cease flying to Paris, Amsterdam and all.

Passengers told to hold in sneezes on all AirAsia flights

KUALA LUMPUR:  Hit by multiple flight delays and cancellations due to an unprecedented outbreak of.

Jakim certifies rain as halal

SHAH ALAM:  At a press conference today the Health Ministry and Malaysian Islamic Development Department.

1MDB CEO Arul Kanda grilled at PAC questioning spa

KUALA LUMPUR:  The long overdue appearance of 1MDB president Arul Kandasamy before the Public Accounts.

Cigarette smugglers give thumbs up to Johor vape ban

JOHOR:  Today the nation’s cigarette smugglers welcomed the royal decree by Sultan Ibrahim Ibni Almarhum.

Disillusioned With Govt And Opposition, Nation Prays New Star Wars Won’t Suck

MALAYSIA:  Today the rakyat disillusioned by the failings of the government and its opposition, confessed.

Govt Makes Bribes Official Language

PUTRAJAYA:  The government announced backhanders are to become the nation’s official second language today.  The.

Tun Mahathir’s Council Of Elders Discuss Taking PM To Mordor

RIVENDELL:  Today Malaysia’s new Council Of Elders called a meeting to discuss what should be.

Najib Quashes Succession Rumours By Appointing Himself Deputy PM

PUTRAJAYA:   In a shrewd political move, government sources reported today Prime Minister Datuk Seri Najib.

Man Following Rahman Dahlan ‘Wake Up Early Toll-Free’ Advice Finds Small Stranger Living In Home

KLANG VALLEY:  Today a man who had been following Rahman Dahlan’s ingenious ‘wake up early’.

Admiral Ackbar warns Tony Pua 1MDB debate sounds like something that rhymes with ‘it’s a crap!’

KUALA LUMPUR:  Today Admiral Akbar intergalactic military commander of the Rebal Alliance expressed concern at.

Boy Wearing Haze Costume This Halloween

MALAYSIA:  Despite our love for horror films, Halloween is not widely celebrated.  That may change.

Vaping Sausages Less Cancerous Than Eating Them

KUALA LUMPUR:  Today Malaysia’s vaping community suggested smelling cooking sausages is a healthier alternative to.

Govt announces shitty toll hike ahead of wonderful people’s budget

PUTRAJAYA:   This week Malaysia’s annual budget season kicked off with some traditional pre-budget toll rate.

TPP Deal: US sends diplomatic grizzlies to Malaysia

WASHINGTON: To commemorate the nation’s participation in the 12 country Trans-Pacific Partnership (TPP), today President.

PM threatens to sue 1MDB critic who is not Tun Mahathir

KUALA LUMPUR:  Today Prime Minister Datuk Seri Najib Tun Razak threatened to sue a man critical.

Najib returns home for treatment after unfortunate Israeli PM handshake

KLIA:  Malaysia’s Prime Minister arrived home this morning for urgently needed treatment after suffering unexpected.

Man no stranger to anonymous donations pledges organs

MILAN:  Today the PM who is no stranger to anonymous donations announced plans to become.