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By Editor On Wednesday, November 9th, 2016
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Soros – I Was Having So Much Fun Toppling Najib I Forgot To Topple Trump

WASHINGTON:  Today Malaysians blamed billionaire George Soros for being so distracted with his obsession with toppling Malaysia’s democratically elected government, that he completely forgot to rig the US More...

By Editor On Monday, November 7th, 2016
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Husband To ‘Strengthen Ties’ With Ah Long

BUKIT JELUTONG:   Today, 42-year-old Abdullah Bin Bakar declared to his family, he will be ‘strengthening his friendship’ with his Ah Long after attending  a series of meetings that took their relationship More...

By Editor On Tuesday, November 1st, 2016
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China Invites Najib’s Cats To Join Family In Beijing

BEIJING:  Today China officials requested Prime Minister Datuk Seri Najib Tun Razak’s family pets be flown over to Beijing this evening to join his wife and sons for the remainder of their week-long official More...

By Editor On Saturday, October 29th, 2016
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PM Avoids Mentioning Dr M By Name In Case He’s Like Voldemort

KUALA LUMPUR:  Today in a fiery speech, Prime Minister Datuk Seri Najib Abdul Razak warned a ’91-year-old man’ and ‘past leader’ was trying to topple the government without mentioning the More...

By Editor On Saturday, October 29th, 2016
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Mall Enters Malaysia Book Of Records For Throwing Out Biggest Uneaten Laksa

KUCHING:  Today, Plaza Merdeka Shopping Centre entered the Malaysia Book Of Records for the second time in two days after  throwing out the nation’s largest amount of ‘unhealthy’ day-old Sarawak More...

By Editor On Friday, October 28th, 2016
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Singaporean Hipsters Say RM20 Johor Entry Fee Still Not Enough To Look Cool Being Seen There

SINGAPORE:   For many years, Singaporeans have escaped their country’s oppressive crime-free cleanliness, and endless queues by fleeing to neighboring Malaysia.   In a friendly ‘tit for tat’ response More...

By Editor On Friday, October 28th, 2016
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Govt Launches TN50 By Hitting Snooze Button

PUTRAJAYA:  In a special ceremony this morning, Prime Minister Datuk Seri Najib Razak officially announced the first step towards Transformasi Nasional (TN50) by hitting the snooze button on the Vision 2020 development More...

By Editor On Sunday, October 23rd, 2016
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Blacklisted Pro-Bersih Companies Still Allowed To Pay Us Taxes, Govt Assures

PETALING JAYA: Not long after Minister in the Prime Minister’s Department Datuk Abdul Rahman Dahlan tweeted companies who support the Bersih movement would be blacklisted from government contracts, PMO insiders More...

By Editor On Saturday, October 22nd, 2016
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Told To Be Uber Drivers, Poor Suggest PM Allow Ride-sharing On His Plane

KUALA LUMPUR:  Today low-income B40 Malaysians lauded the Prime Minister’s suggestion they become Uber drivers to make extra income, with some suggesting the PM and his cabinet ministers allow ride-sharing More...

By Editor On Friday, October 21st, 2016
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Non-Election Budget 2017: PM Wishing He Hadn’t Returned Saudi Donor Money

PUTRAJAYA:  Today the Prime Minister ruled out tabling an election budget this year, with insiders confirming Najib is secretly regretting he returned US$620m of the US$681m Saudi donor money which would be very More...

By Editor On Thursday, October 20th, 2016
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After Hotdog Row, Kevin Bacon Changes Name to Kevin Beef Bacon

HOLLYWOOD:  Today the management of Hollywood actor Kevin Bacon the star of movies such as Footloose, A Few Good Men and X-Men First Class announced he was planning a name change to attract new fans. “Kevin More...

By Editor On Thursday, October 20th, 2016
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Govt Announces Cooking Oil Increase Ahead Of Wonderful People’s Budget

PUTRAJAYA:   Following standard government protocol, news of cooking oil subsidy reductions were leaked early this week, allowing the Prime Minister to announce a raft of measures to help struggling Malaysians More...

By Editor On Wednesday, October 19th, 2016
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Saudi Hotdog Chain Scraps Malaysian Expansion Plan

RIYADH:  Popular Saudi fast-food chain, Hotdog Express admitted it was confused by the hotdog renaming policies enforced by Malaysia’s religious authorities, after abandoning plans to open a KL outlet today. “Hotdog More...

By Editor On Wednesday, October 12th, 2016
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PM’s New App Lets You Tell Him It Was A Waste Of Money

NATION: Today Malaysians learned there is an official Datuk Seri Najib Tun Razak smartphone app which may be used to give the PM direct valuable feedback such as as how developing vanity apps to increase popularity More...

By Editor On Saturday, October 8th, 2016
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Peeping Tom Gives New Jais App Five Stars

SUBANG JAYA:  Professional voyeur and self-appointed syariah law enforcer, 42-year-old Kid Kangkung gave the new Jais smartphone app a five out of five star rating in the Google play store today. “The Jais app More...

By Editor On Saturday, October 8th, 2016
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Inspired By PM, Mugabe Launches 1ZDB

Though Mugabe had no official business with our PM, Najib is obligated to pose in pictures with the Zimbabwean President under the terms of the visiting third-world-leader no-agenda expensive foreign junket exchange More...

By Editor On Wednesday, October 5th, 2016
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M’sians ask Australia – Can We Exchange Nine Convicted Strippers For One Sirul?

KUALA LUMPUR:  Malaysia’s foreign affairs dept today admitted it had been in talks with Australian diplomatic officials keen to negotiate the quick release of the Australian F1 spectators currently in police More...

By Editor On Tuesday, October 4th, 2016
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Thailand blames Kelantan for its high rate of horny men

THAILAND: Officials from Southern Thailand’s border town, Golok, today blamed its huge drugs and prostitution industry on a constant influx of horny Kelantanese men. “We wouldn’t have a big red More...

By Editor On Monday, October 3rd, 2016
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Malaysia Developing Driverless Car Capable Of Tailgating, Using Emergency Lanes

CYBERJAYA:   Today local technology startup Hia Today Bhd announced its new autonomous driver upgrade was intelligent enough to change lanes without indicating, run red lights, tailgate on freeways, and take More...

By Editor On Friday, September 30th, 2016
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Pen-Pineapple As Annoying As Pen-PetroSaudi Deal, Malaysians Say

MALAYSIA:  Today Malaysian netizens admitted the annoying Japanese techno song mind worm ‘Pen-Pineapple-Apple-Pen’ was almost as infuriating as the Prime Minister’s own viral hit ‘pen-1MDB Petrosaudi offshore More...

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