Biawak Screws Kelantan Biawak

KELANTAN: Local reptile researchers witnessed a fascinating display of monitor lizard courtship rituals last night, as an enormous biawak grew tired of the smaller Kelantan biawak carrying it on its shoulder and abruptly decided to screw it.

“Some may think the bigger biawak toying with the smaller one before suddenly fucking it was cruel, but this behavior is typical of cold-blooded biawaks keen to ensure their survival in a complex multi-racial ecosystem,” explained monitor lizard political expediency U-turn analyst Dr. Abdullah Abu Bakar.

Researchers later confirmed the abandoned Kelantan biawak seemed in a state of shock after the surprise copulation before realising it was suddenly very alone.

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