Deep Ocean Search Team Recover DPM’s Missing Balls

“Attend the PM’s leadership solidarity meeting? I don’t think so!”


PUTRAJAYA: This week the nation was shocked to discover that the long-lost testicles of Deputy Prime Minister Tan Sri Muhyiddin Yassin have been recovered from the bottom of the Malacca Straits.

“We were testing underwater locator equipment to be used for the MH370 search when we discovered the missing gonads,” said a naval search and rescue operations spokesman, “the last time the rakyat saw these balls was just before the end of Abdullah Badawi’s Prime Minister-ship in 2009!   Like many, we assumed they were lost forever!”


While he may have been ridiculed at the time, a year ago the recovery of the DPM's balls was predicted by bomoh Ibrahim Mat Zin
The eventual recovery of the DPM’s lost balls was predicted last year by bomoh Ibrahim Mat Zin, though he was ridiculed by many disbelievers at the time.


Muhyiddin's 'apology balloon' only made his absence from the UMNO Chief's unity meeting more noticeable.
Muhyiddin’s ‘apology balloon’ only made his absence from the UMNO Chief’s unity meeting more noticeable.


Since becoming reunited with his balls, Muhyiddin has broken ranks by publicly insisting there should be no public bailout of 1MDB while cabinet members were too busy assuring Malaysians the fund was clean before it had been audited.

Also surprising, was the DPM snubbed the Prime Minister’s ‘Love Me or Leave Me,” UMNO Chiefs solidarity meeting on Sunday, despite ample notice and emphasis of the need to rally behind the nation’s current embattled leader.

“Certainly the DPM can use his balls to stand up to the Prime Minister,” said a UMNO leader, “but what about the PM’s wife?  She may not have been born with balls, but her’s have grown bigger than any of ours!”

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