PKR nominate Anwar’s cat Mat Manja as new Selangor MB candidate

mat manja

Submitted by Royal Appeasement Scramble Editor,

SELANGOR:  Hours after it was known that the Sultan requested more Pakatan Rakyat candidates to replace the current embattled Selangor MB, PKR have announced that Anwar’s much loved family cat, Mat Manja is the party’s new preferred candidate.

“This is a shrewd move by PKR to solve this seemingly endless Selangor MB crisis,” said a political commentator, ‘how can the Sultan resist a cute little guy like Mat Manja?  He’s male, grew up being advised (and fed) by skilled politicians, and best of all, he was born in Selangor!”

Within hours of announcement, a mysterious and damming sex video appeared on the internet showing a cat resembling Mat Manja frolicking with another male or female feline.
Minutes after the announcement, a mysterious and damning online sex video appeared, showing a cat resembling Mat Manja, frolicking with another female (or perhaps male) feline.

“This really was the Kajang Move strategy all along,” said a PKR strategist to gathered journalists, “Awww, you have a wealth of knowledge about running Malaysia’s wealthiest state, don’t you sayang?  Sorry, he tends to scratch a bit until he’s had his dinner.”

water crisis
Given his dislike of baths, Mat Manja would be ideally suited to impartially resolve the state’s long running water crisis.

 

PAS are divided in their support of Mat Manja and rumours persist they have their own Cat Mufti candidate they would like to nominate.
PAS have announced Mat Manja has their full support, but rumours persist they have their own ‘Cat Mufti’ candidate they would rather nominate as MB.

“Mat Manja is a genuinely qualified Selangor MB candidate, and he will not be under my control,” confirmed Anwar in a statement,  “There is no way this cat will be my ‘seat warmer.’  How could that be when everyone knows, he isn’t allowed up on furniture, are you boy?”

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